The hardest relationship you will ever be in is the one with yourself.
Similar to most relationships, it will require work. It will require patience. It will require understanding, nurture, perseverance, and love.
It will require a lot of trial and error. And we mean, a LOT. After all, you won’t know what fits until you have actually tried it.
It’ll be hard because you are the only one you can depend on. There’s nobody else fighting the fight for you. Nobody to make decisions for you. Nobody else to push you to try more, to love harder, to be better.
There’s nobody else.
You are all you got.
The moment you decide you want to embark on this adventure, you are looking to commit for the long haul.
In order to commit wholeheartedly, you have to WANT to. Desire is your strongest motivator. You have to be willing to go through the bumpy roads, the stinky alleys, and the pitch dark caves to get to the other side. Simply put, you won’t be able to take any shortcuts.
There will be setbacks. There will be times where you will get beaten down, discouraged, frustrated. There will be times where you will want to rip your hair out or turn to a bottle of wine for comfort. There will be times where you want to pig out on Chinese takeout and binge-watch 9 hours of Friends. There will be times where you want to blow your entire paycheque on a 50% off sale at Forever 21.
You’ll be tempted to quit.
That’s OK. We all need a pick-me-up from time to time! Acknowledge what you are feeling and doing, be aware of any consequences, and keep trekking on. Keep in mind that you are responsible for your own decisions and actions. The choices you make aren’t affecting anybody but yourself.
Life isn’t all rainbows and butterflies. What comes up must eventually comes down, and so on, so forth. The takeaway, however, is that the work is just about the same whether you choose to be happy or unhappy.
One of the most important lessons you will take away from this journey of self-love is that it’s all tied in together with self-esteem. Loving yourself the way you should – mind, body, and soul, all have a positive correlation to your self-esteem. The moment you decide to love your flaws and quirks, your perfectly imperfect body, your strengths and your weaknesses, is the moment you will become comfortable with being yourself. Your confidence will start building up and you will stop second guessing yourself.
If you are feeling inspired about a hobby, go at it with full force (and passion). If you are feeling overwhelmed, take your mind off of whatever it is and go visit your happy place. Before making a yes or no decision, be in tune with your mind and body and listen to what it is telling you. As Thich Nhat Han once said, “your body is the home of the feelings”, so respect it, trust it, and take care of it.
Another important aspect you will take away from this journey is your reaction. The way you will choose to respond to situations when they arise.
Ultimately it’s better known as the law of attraction. What you feel is what you will attract. We all vibrate at different frequencies when we are faced with a situation, but it’s how we decide to react that will make or break the vibration we are sending out to the universe. The universe works in ways that we have no ways of understanding. However, if even in the darkest moment, you are choosing to react in an optimistic way and believing there is a light at the end of the tunnel, that’s already half the battle right there and you are already being stronger than you think.
Like we said, this will be the hardest relationship you will ever be in.
We are here to remind you that no matter what you do… you are valued, you are important and you are loved.
Don’t ever underestimate or second guess yourself. The moment you decide to say YES to yourself, don’t back down. Don’t let yourself down.
So, in unison now, we want you to repeat after us:
I am strong therefore I won’t give in.
I am flawed therefore I am beautiful and unique.
My self-worth is priceless therefore I am more than enough.
No matter what comes my way, I will persist and overcome.
Welcome to the #SelfLoveClub.
Seeing people succeed while doing what they love fires her up like no other. Aside from being the co-founder of DiscoverHER Project, Jess is a meeting planner by day and a wedding planner by night. Jess is passionate about giving girls and women around the world the same tools she used to get to where she is today. She believes in wearing her heart on her sleeve, doing everything out of a place of love, and empowering people around her to do the same. When she isn’t working, she’s most often found with a good book in hand, brunching with friends (hello mimosas!), or off exploring the world.